The Top 50 Musician Jokes You'll Ever Come Across Tuesday November 14 2023, 11:45 PM
Yona Marie
Singer, Songwriter, Producer.
The Top 50 Musician Jokes You'll Ever Come Across

Musician Jokes

I've made a few posts about some of the best jokes in reference to specific instruments, musical groups, or genres, and I guarantee that many of these laughs are the best ones out there.

How do I know this? Because most music jokes are really corny, so I had to search far and wide to come across some actually good ones! While some are good yet still corny, here is my collection of absolute favorites. 

From jazz to pop, and everything in between, let's uncover the humor that makes the job of a musician sound really entertaining!

Musician Puns

Why can't DJs swim? Because they sync.

If you can't think of a good guitar pun, don't fret.

What do you call a guitar you inherit from your parents? An heir guitar.

What did the robbers take from the music store? The lute.

Some might say the violinists in an orchestra don't do much. They just fiddle around.

Why didn't Handel go shopping? Because he was Baroque.

What do you get when you drop a piano down a mine shaft? A flat miner!

My neighbor quit playing the piano. It just wasn't her forte.

What do choruses use to pay for things? Har-money.

I was jazzed to start dating, but then the problems started marching in and they left me with the blues.


Musician One Liners

Used guitar for sale, no strings attached.

I've got a drummer joke… But it's hard to beat.

The locksmith was a great piano teacher because he was always aware of the correct key.

I have a trumpet joke but don't want to blow it.

A drummer got a tattoo of their drum kit…it was very cymbalic.

A student showed up late to piano lessons… and he got in treble for it.

There are 3 types of drummers, the ones that can count and the ones that can't.

Sorry, I tooted, and it came out of my brass. 

A violinist was caught following a string of robberies. 

I'd tell you my new music saxophone joke but it only works if you can't reed.

Musician Riddles 

Why did the cat decide to become a DJ? He heard there was a lot of scratching involved.

What's God's favorite chord? Answer: Gsus.

Why did the DJ always carry a map? So he wouldn't get lost in the mix!

Why was the guitar late for work? He got caught in a jam.


Where do pianists go on vacation? Answer: The Florida Keys.

Why is Stephen Hawing so good at air guitar? Because he has excellent string theory.

How many guitarists does it take to play Stairway to Heaven? Apparently, all of them.

How do you make a piano laugh? Tickling its ivories!

I was going to make a joke about drummers but, um, Tsss!

Musician Jokes For Kids

What do you call a zombie DJ? A deadbeat.

What do DJs call their puppies? Subwoofers.

Why don't they hold band competitions in the jungle? Too many cheetahs.

Why are pirates such good singers? They can hit the high Cs.

What do you call a musical insect? A humbug!

What did the vegetable say to the DJ? “Lettuce turnip the beet.”

What do you call a cow that plays guitar? A moo-sician.

How does a guitarist communicate? Through "chord-ination"!

Why did the fish make such a good guitarist? He knew his scales.

Why is crossing the street like playing the piano? Answer: You need to C# or else you will Bb.

Why was the piano tuner hired as a baseball coach? Because he had perfect pitch!


Adult Musician Jokes

My uncle was crushed by a piano. His funeral was very low-key.

Took my kid to a classical music concert. It was a disaster. Way too much sax and violins.

What happens when you play Beethoven backward? Answer: He decomposes.

What's better than roses on a piano? Tulips on an organ.

Saw my violin teacher on the 9 o’clock news. He was fiddling with the kids.

What type of cap does a stoned drummer wear? A high hat.

What's brown and sits on a piano stool? Beethoven's final movement.

Musicians are perverts. The drummer sits in the back beating it, the guitarist is constantly fingering minors, and the bassist is slapping it around.

You will get into treble if you tell sax jokes.

What do you call a saxophonist, that plays Tenor and Baritone? Bisaxual.

Why is it dangerous to have more than one violin in your house? Because it leads to domestic violins.

Yona Marie

As a session singer, writer, and producer that has worked with over 300 clients to provide high-quality jingles, singles, and features, Yona spends her time creating and marketing new music and helpful resources for creators. Check out Yona’s latest releases on her Spotify, her Youtube and share if you like it!

If you are in need of singer, songwriter or song producer services, see what Yona Marie can offer you on her services page.

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