If you're a guitar player with a sense of humor, chances are that you've heard a few jokes about guitarists throughout the years, but a lot of them were super corny.
There's a 'good corny' and there's a 'bad corny' when it comes to music jokes, and I'm a huge fan of good corny, and downright funny jokes that music nerds can truly appreciate.
Check out some of these laughs below, and leave a few in the comments if you have a great one that I missed! No type of joke is off-limits.
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Used guitar for sale, no strings attached.
You know I really want a new guitar, but for now, I'm too baroque.
If you can't think of a good guitar pun, don't fret.
Someone told me they would chase after me whilst playing guitar and I asked, "is that a fret?"
If you want to get a guitarist to stop playing, put sheet music in front of them.
My wife likes to crochet and plays the guitar, so she's a real knit picker.
I told my guitar that I loved her... but she just fretted.
My guitar is fly just like me; we only take cute picks.
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Every time I see a white guy with a guitar at a party I ask myself… I Wonderwall he's going to play?
Why was the famous guitarist extremely anxious and tired? Because he was strung out.
Why can't Woody play his guitar? He doesn't know where his Pixar.
What do you call a female police officer who plays the guitar? SHE RIFF.
I always write sad music with my guitar I guess that's why they call it a fretboard.
How do guitarists greet each other? With a chord-ial handshake!
Why was the guitar late for work?
Answer: He got caught in a jam.
What is the difference between a savings bond and a guitarist?
Answer: Eventually, a savings bond will mature and earn money.
How do you get a guitarist to stop playing?
Answer: Put sheet music in front of them.
What's God's favorite chord?
What's the difference between an electric guitar player and a vacuum cleaner?
Answer: When you unplug a vacuum cleaner it doesn't suck anymore.
Why is Stephen Hawing so good at air guitar?
Answer: Because he has excellent string theory.
What do you call a guitar you inherit from your parents?
Answer: An heir guitar.
What do you call a beautiful woman on the arm of a guitarist?
Answer: A tattoo.
Why did the guitar take a nap?
Answer: It was feeling a little "strung" out!
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Two jazz guitarists meet in a bar, and one says, "Yeah man, I bought your last album, it was awesome!" to which the other replies, "Oh so that was you!".
A young child told his mother "When I grow up I'm going to be a guitarist." His mother responded, "Well honey, you know you can't do both."
A woman is arrested for beating her husband up with his guitar collection. The judge asked "First offender?" The wife answered, "No. First a Gibson. Then a Fender".
How does a guitarist greet another guitarist? "I'm better than you".
Why did the guitar player get arrested? Because they fingered the G String!
Why are guys always looking at girl guitar players? They're checking out their G-Strings.
How many guitarists does it take to play Stairway to Heaven? Apparently, all of them.
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What is the best way to describe a guitar that never finishes its work at the office? It's a quitar!
What do you call a cow that plays guitar? A moo-sician.
What did the guitar say to the musician? "I'm so 'amped' to be played by you!"
What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? You can tune a guitar but you can't tuna fish.
What's a pigeon's favorite guitar? A "coo" stick guitar.
What's a guitarist's favorite snack? String cheese!
Why did the fish make such a good guitarist? He knew his scales.
How does a guitarist communicate? Through "chord-ination"!
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